https://davidhardiman.com A safe and legal literary drug. Now available in prescription strength. Thu, 01 Jan 2026 16:51:16 +0000 en-US hourly 1 https://wordpress.org/?v=6.9.4 https://davidhardiman.com/wp-content/uploads/cropped-Header-32x32.jpg https://davidhardiman.com 32 32 https://davidhardiman.com/blog/a-random-list-that-has-nothing-to-do-with-the-new-year/ Thu, 01 Jan 2026 16:49:46 +0000 https://davidhardiman.com/?p=7237 Archimedes, angered at misplacing his toga, exclaims “Eureka, I have lost it!” Archimedes math problems keep multiplying Archimedes says he’s screwed! (think, think, that’s it. You have found it!) It has been determined that William Shatner’s body is 95% ham The bark of Dogwood trees is ruff Self-Check Out is very popular these days. In […]

The post ***A Random List that has Nothing to Do with the New Year*** first appeared on davidhardiman.com.]]> 7237 https://davidhardiman.com/blog/new-olympic-sports/ Sun, 04 Aug 2024 18:27:26 +0000 https://davidhardiman.com/?p=7133 3 on 6 Basketball – Seems unfair and it is Oh Give Me a Break Dancing – A counseling session where clear-eyed therapists try to persuade Break Dancers that, for God’s sake, Break Dancing is not a sport. I mean it’s a thing, it’s just not a sport Blue Collar Fencing – Forget sabers, epées […]

The post New Olympic Sports first appeared on davidhardiman.com.]]> 7133 https://davidhardiman.com/blog/new-tv-series-announced/ Wed, 14 Feb 2024 01:58:07 +0000 https://davidhardiman.com/?p=6875 The Butchelor – A meat cutter searches for romance amongst a pool of free-range carnivores. If the Butchelor is interested, he sends her a single long-stemmed short-rib. The Meat & Greets are fleshy affairs where competitors can get their pork-pulled or their chicken-jerked depending on whatever thrills your grill. It’s rare that a show in […]

The post New TV Series Announced first appeared on davidhardiman.com.]]> 6875 https://davidhardiman.com/blog/should-i-get-onboard-with-amtrak/ Fri, 02 Jun 2023 01:08:29 +0000 https://davidhardiman.com/?p=6540 Some say being a lover of trains is a choice. Others say it’s an interest you’re just born with. This argument is often applied to other deeply-seated orientations. The point is, I can no longer deny my interest in trains and I choose to express it publicly, despite the risk of becoming a social outcast. […]

The post Should I Get Onboard with Amtrak? first appeared on davidhardiman.com.]]> 6540 https://davidhardiman.com/blog/my-letter-to-the-new-york-times/ Fri, 13 Aug 2021 05:06:26 +0000 https://davidhardiman.com/?p=5495 after drinking way too much moonshine Kombucha. It’s in response to an article and video about Sarah Silverman Guest Hosting the Jimmy Kimmel Show and the letter goes like this – to the letter:   Hey NYT. Fit this to print, My belligerency quotient is rising, but don’t worry. I’m still lovable. I’ve been, for […]

The post My Letter to the New York Times first appeared on davidhardiman.com.]]> 5495 https://davidhardiman.com/blog/new-years-20-21-and-counting-22-23-24/ Fri, 01 Jan 2021 19:51:15 +0000 https://davidhardiman.com/?p=5120 Orphans Ask to Meet Their Maker Orphans residing at the Sweet Charity Home for Orphans asked their home’s director if they could meet their maker. After clearing several legal hurdles the children were reunited with their birth parents. “Don’t get me wrong,” remarked little Fletcher, “Meeting our parents is great and everything, but we were […]

The post New Year’s 20 21 and Counting 22 23 24… first appeared on davidhardiman.com.]]> 5120 https://davidhardiman.com/blog/new-years-resolution-to-transcend-these-things-that-bother-me/ Fri, 03 Jan 2020 17:59:52 +0000 https://davidhardiman.com/?p=4891 I’m living in fear that Jeopardy! does not have a succession plan for Alex Trebek. I’ll take Worry for $2000 Alex. Same for “Wheel” and Pat. And don’t get me started on Vanna. That chick is 62 years old now. She’s been turning heads and letters for over 30 years now*. * I know, I […]

The post New Year’s Resolution: To Transcend These Things that Bother Me first appeared on davidhardiman.com.]]> 4891 https://davidhardiman.com/blog/an-equilibrious-new-year/ Tue, 01 Jan 2019 16:41:26 +0000 https://davidhardiman.com/?p=4617 As the New Year dawns I feel I must inform my friends of the resolution I’ve made – and no, it’s not the sexual reassignment surgery. The reports of my gender dysphoria have been greatly exaggerated.   No, this New Year I resolve not to be funny anymore. For some, like Dana and Sandy, who […]

The post An Equilibrious New Year first appeared on davidhardiman.com.]]> 4617 https://davidhardiman.com/blog/costcos-new-product-showcase/ Wed, 16 May 2018 15:59:54 +0000 https://davidhardiman.com/?p=4396 Whirlpool Water Hardener: Who wants soft water when these days you need all the minerals you can get. So what if your hair is always sudsy. An actual size Map of the United States in 1:1 scale. A must when 100% accuracy is required. Folds neatly and fits into most any airplane hangar. Also comes […]

The post Costco’s New Product Showcase first appeared on davidhardiman.com.]]> 4396 https://davidhardiman.com/blog/new-grocery-store-foods-for-2017/ https://davidhardiman.com/blog/new-grocery-store-foods-for-2017/#respond Sat, 14 Jan 2017 14:26:10 +0000 https://davidhardiman.com/?p=3684 Warning: This easily contrived list has no nutritive value and is not a substitute for a healthy, well-balanced chuckle. Prolonged exposure to this list may result in Ben Carson. Don’t ask me how, it just does. I learned that the hard way.   1. Hollow Core Oreos: For the cookie connoisseur who supports the 2nd […]

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