1. Progress on the set. My Intimacy Coordinator used to direct me with a 10-foot pole. Now she uses a 6-foot pole. What’s next – a yardstick.
2. Worst pick-up line ever: “Jesus may have died for your sins, but right now I’m dying for them.”
3. What’s a foot to do? My stout toenails keep breaking my nail clippers: #keratinstrong #toejamfootball #thislittlepiggie
4. My dentist also operates a popular taco truck. He’s a real cavity-filler.
5. Where’s Marilyn McCoo these days? She was the 1970s Tyra Banks.
6. And Speaking of Banks. Could I be any less excited about that stealthy street artist Banksy? You’ve got dedicated artists spending thousands of dollars on Masters of Fine Arts programs, and this guy spray paints a “Keep on Truckin'” dude on a brick wall in an alley and suddenly it’s a National Heritage Site.
7. I’m not really white. I’m just choosing to be white. Some say gay people do this with their sexuality – that it’s a choice. Hmmm. I wonder if I could pray the “white” away.
8. Mt. Denali has gone from Mt. McKinley and back to Mt. Denali again. Remember folks. It’s just a mountain and will always be a mountain no matter what you call it. Then again see #9
9. What’s in a name? The United States had a Department of War from 1789 until 1947 when it was eventually changed to the less bellicose and more protective Department of Defense. Were we actively planning or seeking wars until 1947? 
10. Why am I just finding out now there’s Double Stuf Oreos? Damn it people. Keep me in the loop.
11. Was Zsa Zsa Gabor’s middle name Zsa? Asking for Boutros Boutros Galli.

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