Posts Tagged ‘quips’

These Mental Morsels are Quipilicious

Merry Chlistmas everyone!
I know. There’s Noel in Christmas
What’s New in Books?
Archivists have found an alternate manuscript to Amy Alcott’s “Little Women” titled “Very Little Women” where all the women are under 3 feet tall
Maybe Immanuel Kant, but Immanuel better. 
Who can ever forget 27 years and 42 days ago?
In case you did, it was May 17th, 1997. (written on June 28, 2024)
George Washington was asked if because of “urological” issues in the Revolutionary War, that instead of being known as the Continental Army, the troops were known as the Incontinental Army?
He answered, “Depends.”
Dave’s Life Hack #363:
Remember, you cannot email escargot.
Escargot can only be sent by snail mail.
People, this is no time for frivolity.
(wait for it, wait for it)
OK, now it is. 🥸
God tells underachieving teenager he must attend summer school and pass his Kidney class. Otherwise he faces Kidney Failure.
Just a heads up everybody – I’ve NOT been hacked.
It’s the same old goofy me, meeting the low bar of friendship we have.
How Gullible are You?
IF YU Kan Reed THS, Y’ve alreddy wasted 5 sekonds of yur Lyfe. Zeriously
What if…Oh never mind. Then again, maybe. Right?
Cuz, y’know, it could. In fact, it probably is.
This new Chinese restaurant is kinda glum. At the end of the meal, they give you an Unfortunate Cookie.
And, according to their website, you have to accept their cookies.
I visited the Oreos website and a pop-up asked me if I’d accept their cookies.
Of course. That’s why I’m there. For the cookies.
What am I missing here:
May the June 4th be with you?
I have nothing to say right now. And it shows.”
The above quip was written for David Hardiman by AI
Ho Hum.
Sitting around, doin’ nuthin’.
I am now Bored Certified. And qualified to practice being bored at any NV hospital. Yes!